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Friday, October 11, 2013


See above picture? That is my hand. Yes it is petite and fairly smaller than the "average hand". There is something off about it according to other people. Some people even look down on me when they see my hands. Do you see it yet? Probably not. Maybe a scenario will help you figure out the difference.

Say that I am at the grocery and you see me carrying around a 6 month old baby. You notice I look quite young and hardly look 18 when in actuality I am 22. You are thinking.. "wow that is a young mom" and automatically you look at my left hand and notice there isn't a ring there. It is an instant judgement.

Ever since I became pregnant and started showing, every where I go... People look at my hands. It had gotten to the point that I rarely left the house. Funny that my hands made me feel so self conscious.

I have come to terms that Justin and I are not going to get married soon. Not because we are not happy or that we don't love each other. We've been together almost six years so we have an enormous amount of love for each other. He is my best friend and sure it should be the next step. But we do want to become financially stable before we take that next leap.

Yes I did think that when I got pregnant, he would propose and we would have a quick small wedding. It was the right thing to do... Right? But honestly, if Maddie wasn't here, would we be engaged or married right now? The answer is no. So why try and force something? Since when did having a baby mean that you needed to get married? Whether we are married or not, Maddie knows that Mommy and Daddy are together and they love her and each other very much.

So what am I getting at with this post? What do I want this post to do? How do I want to make other people feel from reading my thoughts? I want people to stop judging and looking down on me or feeling sorry for me just because I don't have that special ring. Justin and I act like a married couple. We've been together longer than some married couples. We just don't have that title. 

There is no doubt in mind that I will marry Justin. He knows every little thing about me. He knows me the best out of anyone in my life. He knows me inside and out and like I said before... He is my best friend. When the time is right, it will happen. Our main focus is on Madison. Our main goal as a couple is to cherish our daughter.

So I leave you with this... next time you see a ring less mother, don't make assumptions on what her life entails. Children are the greatest gifts we can bring onto this Earth. Pardon my french, but I am pretty damn proud of my daughter and I am completely happy with where I am in my life and that she is here whether I have that ring or not.

Much love,
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